I think the life cycle is all backwards..........
You should die first, start out dead and get it out of the way. Then you wake up in a nursing home, feeling better every day.
You get kicked out for being too healthy, go collect your pension, then, when you start work, you get a gold watch on your first day. You work 40 years until you're young enough to enjoy your retirement.
You drink alcohol, you party, you're generally promiscuous, and you get ready for Secondary School.
You go to primary school, you become a kid, you play, you have no responsibilities. You become a baby, then, you spend your last 9 months floating peacefully with luxuries like central heating, spa room service on tap, larger quarters everyday, and finally you finish off as an orgasm.
I rest my case.