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Its bigger on the inside

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Blame Culture

Not posted here in a while but since this topic has been raised again I shall be succinct.

I recently moved in to a new apartment and...

Sod it, just watch, I'll let you decide.

http://youtu.be/R8TysZMKyG4

Tim B

Tim B

 

Top Gear!

A new series of top gear started last night btw in case you are a fan and didn't know, that marauder thing is made of win, I want one!

http://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/b0129r3z/Top_Gear_Series_17_Episode_1/

Tim B

Tim B

 

Wow

What else can I say, these double strength ibuprofen are amazing.

Did my back in yesterday which hurt like hell and got these today, take just one and like *poof* pain gone.

Tim B

Tim B

 

Stormy Sunday *Pics*

Well yesterday was quite the day for some parts of my region with torrential rain, hail, lightning and thunder. The first and most spectacular one to pass through my area began at about 1:45 PM, which I reported here. http://www.netweather.tv/forum/index.php?showtopic=39078 The rain and hail in the first storm was the most spectacular part really, it turned the roads in to rivers and looking out the double doors at the back and the glass panel above them it seemed as if the house was going through a giant car wash. This came as a bit of a surprise as I wasn't expecting to see thunderstorm activity up here yesterday given the godawful grey start to the day, and I dare say today looks similar with lightning strikes being picked up in some areas now. This theme also looks set to continue from what I am reading on the homepage etc, though I personally don't mind unsettled weather in summer so long as it is warm and thundery. (Lol, that's the best kind of summer as long as it is both warm and thundery enough!) Anyway I got a couple of pictures on my cell phone while I was out and thought I would share them, so here they are. Overflowing pond. First storm moving away Second cell approaches. Second cell moves away. Thats all from me for today, I think I might go get some free WoW time in now Take care. -- T.

Tim B

Tim B

 

Uggggggg

I seriously gotta cut down on the drink.. Not very likely though, heeh.

Tim B

Tim B

 

Bins

Simple story this. Friday is bin day for me here, and normally I take the bin out when I hear the wagon then bring it back in to the yard once its done with. However yesterday I was out from 9 am till 7 pm, and as expected I returned to the alley to find no damn bin.. This used to happen at my old place as well. Now is it my imagination or do people these days simply have no ?? respect whatsoever? Or is the weekly ganking of wheelie bins some modern MTV thing I'm not familiar with?

Tim B

Tim B

 

*Groans under breath*

Well it looks as if nature had quite a party in some parts of the UK over the last 24 hours, and is continuing to do so in northern Ireland atm. However it would seem that mother nature had guzzled far too many Tequilas by the time the party got to me during the early hours of this morning and was feeling a bit worse for where, and has now spent most of today in a heap hugging the toilet with a splitting headache, sick down the front of her shirt and drooling on to her jeans (as well as the cold, damp bathroom tiles) I was woken up again earlier by what sounded slightly like thunder at first, but it was just the DIY kings again.. Following this I made my way down the stairs to have a certain cat of mine running around my feet constantly emanating a sound that can only be described as something similar to a run away petrol lawn mower that escaped from farmer Ted, and after devouring its way through 3 hedges, a family of hedgehogs and the Brackwell pumpkin patch. Slammed right through my kitchen window eating up my copper change jar in an unholy screech like 1000 nails on a giant chalk board whilst simultaneously shredding a 10 gallon sack of cat litter scattering it out in all directions, sending pots and pans flying and ultimately causing the utter carnage which currently resides in there. (Yes, the cat noise was down to her wanting to feed her face with yet more envelopes of that Whiskers Churchill downs mystery meat cuts in gravy) Why do I get the feeling its going to be one of THOSE days..?

Tim B

Tim B

 

Will you still need me, will you still feed me..

That message in the text box there was generated by that auto ding thing as I don't talk like that, honest.. I can't believe I haven't posted in here since Christmas (thank god that's over with!) but what with the move etc (and an obvious WoW addiction) I haven't been around as much these last few months, though with summer finally upon us I should be around a lot more for the heat and storms. I love the atmosphere (pardon the pun) in the storms area when the summer events break out and I'm looking forward to seeing what this summer has in store for us, heres hoping for a lively one! Haven't got much else to talk about really except Berts little 64 celebratory day trip from the swamp of sorrows to Silvermoon with a friend of mine the other day where we ended up getting in to a bar fight.. 3 Times, guards over tables etc. Was quite funny actually especially when level 9's and 13's kept jumping in and getting inadvertantly wiped by aoe's, and I was surprised to see our trade channel operating there as I've never seen that in an enemy city before. I wonder if thats a glitch? Felt strange being there with a human char. Anyway heres a few pictures, Enjoy! They are stacked chronologically so some of the better ones are near the bottom. Darkshire, start. Ghostlands. Eversong. Ok, the fun part! Notice the trade channel and local, etc I think this pic is my favorite, right outside the auction house. The bar. (Guards game for running in and going over tables..) The end.

Tim B

Tim B

 

Stuff

Hmm Christmas only a few days away now! Sure doesn't feel like it though, for me at least. Between work still owing me over £300 from last month, being up to me eyebrows in debt, and the court telling me I have to move house by mid January my thoughts really haven't been with it this year. (What's Christmas all about anyway? Each year it just gets more and more expensive and more less of a bloody point.) Having said that however I'm not too bothered by any of that nonsense because I have had something else cutting me up inside as if I'd inadvertently fallen in to a derelict furniture factory, swallowed a rusty blunt nail gun, then developed an recurring round of hiccups every evening after 6 for the last 2 weeks. Forcing me in to drinking large amounts of fizzy beer and vodka beverages in the vein hope that it will produce a big enough burp to expel it. Though here's only one person on the planet who I've told and thus has any idea what that's all about, but I'm not going to tell you. Ha ha ha. (No its probably not what your thinking either) The person is friend of mine whom I've decided to trust this burden to. Apparently in their eyes its no big deal and this person didn't see it as anything that should be bothering me, though I personally beg to differ because if it was nothing then my mind would simply trash it like it has the aforementioned rubbish surely? Then again all of us are different I suppose. Moving on. There's been a few errm, interesting distractions over the last few days as well. Like what happened at work the other day, one of the guys bubble wrapped a large CRT television for me to give to a customer and wrote, "TV" over the front of it in big red indelible marker. Just so I knew what it was, like.. Then later I went in to the warehouse and found some of the guys trying to assemble a large wooden tv stand that looked like some horrible retro black magazine case from the 1940's. So I asked what it was all about and one of them explained it was for a customer collect and they were assembling it because he couldn't manage to build the one he had from flat (or something like that) TV guy was there of course and then asked pretty much the same thing only wondering why the customers own stand was, "flat / broken" "Oh it may have been due what happened in the car park earlier" I replied. "Why what happened?" He asked. To which I replied, "Oh, I took an identical stand out to a customer and it fell off the trolley, then got accidentally reversed over by a Humvee H2 packed with Christmas cards and mince pies driven by a Tom Cruise lookalike. It happened earlier before you came in." "Really!" "Yeah! Really.." I really shouldn't be such a [email protected], but sometimes it can be funny.. Ok, my BS aside now. I'm sure some of you will have seen that post in the retreat featuring a certain car for sale on E-Bay? You know, the one with the Burberry inspired rust-infected filler? The whole thing was a mock auction by someone with a brilliant though slightly eccentric sense of humour, though it made me laugh. Some of the comments being the funniest part of the whole thing. See this link here for the auction page: Click Here - Long URL Here's a few of my personal favourite comments from this, urrm.. Auction: ** Relisted due to timewaster: this guy turned up and offered me cash! Come on - I'm not gonna fall for that one. Do I look like an idiot (answer not needed). Then another guy came to view... and started laughing... and continued laughing... and the last I saw him he was rolling around on my lawn, still laughing (I decided to draw the curtains on him at ten past midnight. I think he's now mating with a cat, or arguing with a cat - one of the two. Either way there's an awful racket going on outside). ** GOOD POINTS: * Wheel at each corner * Doesn't explode on start up * Converted to run on neighbours' siphoned petrol * Go-faster stripes on ashtray * Many fag ends in ashtray are of a still-smokeable length * There's definitely a clingfilm wrapped eighth still inside the car somewhere * Free 'Police Aware' sticker and black/yellow crime scene tape BAD POINTS: * I may have lied about all the good points * Does explode on start up * Lurches ever-so slightly to the left when taking corners at over 70mph on estates * Interior splattered with arterial blood from a savage and senseless knifing * An all-pervasive sense of doom at the futility of life appears when over 30mph * Deep face-shaped dent in bonnet (expression: one of surprise) * Two suspected knee dents in grill * Bullet holes in windscreen (not MOT failure) Q: IS IT A CONVERTIBLE Yes. Upon starting the engine it converts petrol into sheet flame and this sometimes results in the roof compacting itself neatly into the boot. Q: Hi There i was just wondering if the wind screen wipers are in good or fair condition, as i hate going down the motor way with smears on the window. Mel The windscreen wipers are in excellent condition. However, the windscreen itself has several small but very serious cracks, a smattering of bullet holes, one or two hardly noticeable pool cue indentations, a smidgeon of blood and hair, the odd patch of fogging, a hairline smash and, finally, the windscreen has a slight tendency to fall completely out of the windscreen surround and decapitate the driver and front seat passenger. But none of these are MOT failures. Q: u really were bored I was even more bored when your question came in. But not so bored last night when you were on the late shift and your wife was feeding me biscuits. But thanks for your input. And the Jaffa Cakes. Sorry about the crumbs. Q: R O L M F A O ............. 'Running Over Lino Making me Feel An Orphan'? That's not what I intended. Oh... wait a minute - ‘Rolling On the floor Laughing My weeble Off’ - got yer. Now, that's better. Still, that’s quite a high price to pay for being amused - laughing one’s weeble RIGHT off. Not to mention being desperately unhygienic. On the upside, you’ve now got a new desktop pen-holder. And a reason to never again chew your biro… Q: Hi there, can you tell me the story behind the machette holes? And whos face is imprinted on the bonnet? Anyone famous? Ronan Keating’s music is so middle-of-road that I actually ran over him. Q: Hi, What kind of sound system is there is in the car? A: There is a Sony tape/radio in tip-top condition. I got it off the top of a tip. So it only plays rubbish. But never mind because the sound of music and passenger conversation is completely drowned out by the noise of the engine having an epileptic fit, the gearbox being date-raped by the drive shaft, the exhaust coughing up blood, the brakes screaming 'I won't do it! I won't do it!', the wheel rims shredding the tyres and the unholy shreak of sirens from the twelve police cars and seventeen fire engines chasing you down the wrong way down a duel carriageway. So I tend to whistle. Q: would the doors bend into a handbag,my wife quite likes the design ? A: Yes, yes they would - good idea. And congratulations on being married to a giant. Q: well mate i thought id seen it all i have now A: Hi. Yeah, I thought I'd seen it all too. Then I realised I'd never seen a Jewish postman with leg calipers and a bag of poisoned bananas sitting atop an elephant with abandonment issues and a docked tail running blindly through a burning zoo at sunset on a Pancake Tuesday. See, just when you think you've got infinite possibility beat, you get bowled a googly. Q: i've reported you for selling weapons of mass destruction on ebay. A: Ha ha. You should have told Tony Blair - he would have believed you. I prefer to think of it as a vehicle of mass dysfunction. It has a lot of problems but I believe we can work through them. With a chainsaw. Q: Heyy!!I was Just Wonderin if this car has ah Cig Lighter??...Can I have 20p for a ciggy??Kerry&Lauren!! A: It does have a lighter, but it's one of those infruriating ones you sometimes get in older cars that, when you push it in, it stays in, and you wait and you wait and you wait - driving along with a dry cig in your mouth - only to find that the bloody lighter never bloody well pops out. Most smokers will have experienced this. It's worse than if the car doesn't have a lighter at all because it sets up an expectation that you're going to have a cig before unkindly crushing your expectation flat. Having said that, I don't smoke anymore so I've replaced the cigarette lighter with an electric pencil sharpener. It's fun but slightly messy. And it means I can't classify the car as unleaded. Q: Top! Hey-but no-but yeah-but though-but can you deliver but? A: Delivery is possible but I'm afraid it would go something like this: After wrenching myself out of the restraining arms of my weeping family who, as one, are begging me not to do it, I get in the car and head towards you. I, myself, even at this early stage, am also sobbing. Because of the brakes' tendency not to work I recklessly run every red light and plough, literally, straight across every roundabout, gathering a grill full of flowers and road signs. Hitting the motorway on-ramp in a shower of sparks I enter the motorway at such insane velocity, and with such obvious disregard for my own life and the lives of others, that all 3 lanes of traffic immediately stamp on their brakes - (setting a new world record for synchronised emergency stops with combined rear-enders). Ignoring the mushroom cloud of flame and twisted metal in my rear-view mirror I thunder on, throwing the gear-stick onto the back seat as it comes off in my hand, the car now gushing a river of leaking fuel behind. Unable to see through the shattered windscreen I have to thrust my head out the driver's window until my eyes are wind-slashed slits of blood, my eyebrows are sugared white with ice and my clamped teeth are peppered black with insect-death. At the correct motorway exit I desperately slingshot the car across all lanes and hit the off-ramp in a sickening balloon of sparks, which conveniently ignites the leaking fuel trail behind. I am then pursued by a three-foot wall of orange flame and twelve fire engines until - after flattening two dogs, three binmen and a local bus shelter - I finally hurtle towards your front door, whereupon, and with appalling accuracy, I slam the car straight into your living room and kill the cat. BUT... having said all that... is next Tuesday okay? Q: Hi - I'M SURE I OWNED THIS CAR ONCE, DOES IT HAVE LEPOPARD PRINT SEAT COVERS & AN EIGHT BALL GEARSTICK. DAZ A: Daz, hi, no. It has a flourescent orange polyester interior with bright yelllow go-faster striping. The first time I looked at it I temporarily lost my sight and had to sit down on a low wall and weep. Don't worry thouigh, the eyesight does eventually return. But for the first ten minutes I wouldn't recommend operating heavy machinery, like, for instance, this car. Which is something of a drawback, I admit; when you first get in you have to sit there for a good ten minutes letting your eyes adjust. It is tempting to drive off before full use of your eyes has returned, but this could lead to you losing control on the local high street, blindly running over a lollipop man, mounting the pavement with him still on the bonnet, crashing through the doors of Marks & Spencer and descending the escalator on two wheels before coming to rest in a smoking, steaming mass in the food department. (My case comes up next month). At the time, I got out of the wreckage and said, 'This isn't just any food smeared over the bonnet with the spit and snot of Christmas shoppers, this is Marks & Spencer food!'. Which I thought was a pretty good effort considering I had a Mexican Three Bean Wrap jammed in one nostril and a fresh fruit salad in the other. Q: Loving your style, brother. Has this baby been on 'Pimp My Ride'? peace. A: Hi. No, it was on 'Tart My Car'. We were thrown off 'Pimp My Ride' when I accidently stepped on Tim Westwood's low slung denim crotch. It's easily done. Q: Hi, does the car have any outstanding HP? Thanks Jam. A: Hi. Yes, it has an outstanding blob of HP sauce on the dash and a fatastic drip of ketchup on the steering wheel. Thanks Hehe, as you've probably gathered I love sarcastic humour like this. Moving on again. Urm, well, see for yourself: http://www.theregister.co.uk/2006/12/20/wi...dites_araldite/ I wonder what wiki page he was eye balling at the time however.. If anyone else has any daft links or stories then then let me know as I could do with more humorous reading. Take care. Oh and merry Christmas

Tim B

Tim B

 

Magic Defrag 2

I've been testing the beta version of Magical Disk Defragmenter 2 from http://www.ashampoo.com/frontend/homepage/...ssion_langid=20 today having used the old version for over a year now. Its pretty cool I must say. Oooh, hehe!

Tim B

Tim B

 

Pseudorandom S**te

Huh? With the exception of this image I haven't uploaded anything yet ^^. Ah well here's to another Sunday spent at crappy work! With everyone hung over from last nights crimbo party I might add Which I didn't go to however since they wanted me to pay £30 just for the privilege since I've only been there 5 minutes, something which I had no intention of doing considering it was £10 for everybody else. Which is still taking the jaffa cakes imo. Even though its only once a year I'd rather spend my money in town going from one place to another, though having said that I could have probably crashed it and got in for nothing if I wanted with the old, "Look in to my eyes, look in to my eyes! Not around the eyes, look in to the eyes, *click* you're under! Thing.. As you probably know already I went around town on Friday night anyway with some people I've not seen in ages, it was a pretty fun night actually and I met a couple of interesting characters as well. Like that girl who my friend had with her, she was very cool and I hope I see her again actually as theres something I wouldn't mind asking her Following on there was Saturdays Invasion on our custom UT2004 server, which I thought was ace especially since I haven't played it for ages! Plus with me being an admin there as I can give everyone special treats, hehe! See this cafe thread for a couple of pics of that insanity: http://www.netweather.tv/forum/index.php?s...4658&st=20# It was a great afternoons gaming that, it really was! If you play UT2004 or just happen to have it installed then check our weapons of power server out some time, heres the address: ut2004://204.11.33.157:7777 Annoying custom map crashes aside the regulars and myself have had some good games there. Moving away from the gaming scene the second half of the third series of Stargate Atlantis has been pretty interesting so far, I really enjoyed that episode with the whales that I saw just over a week ago. I thought it was quite cleverly done and it was something of a one and only as it didn't reference recent happenings in previous episodes at all, something critics have nit picked to death right from the start though I found it very refreshing as sequential stories inheriting off each other all the time becomes a tedious and boring monotony very quickly when it drags over in to a new series and just carries on like they seem to think it should. "Its not real life to digress like that!" They say.. "Good!" I say, I've got enough real life every day thanks, a nice cold beer on a hot summer evening is really refreshing every now and then. My new avatar came from that episode actually, here's that image uncompressed: Anyway speaking of cold beer I think I'll shut up now and go get one (or something close anyway, so long as it has precious alcohol :lol: ) Thanks for reading! Take care!

Tim B

Tim B

 

I wish I was gay

Well long story short I've just got back from town and went for a drink around most of the bars like I always do, the gay bars included, and as usual the same sex tends to show a more genuine interest towards me than the opposite sex does. (Who seem to delight in wasting extortionate amounts of my time and money) If only I could reciprocate, my life would be much more fun! Ah well, go figure..

Tim B

Tim B

 

What a flaming day!

Ahhh pay day at last after 5 weeks.. Or is it? Apparently not as it seems my new employer messed up with my bank details and its gone somewhere else, leaving me with no fags and no beer.. .. Aaagain. Its my fault looking at what's happened as I'm thick as 2 planks when it comes to paperwork as hand written work is something my brain is not good at (possibly due to undiagnosed dyslexia or some super duper, anyway who cares?), what's happened is I've gone and written out a couple of number 9s like 4s in the codes and everythings gone tits up as a result. Viva la beerless. So I've been chasing this around all day with colleague support and my bank trying to track it down without much success, though it is on my banks records now along with the incorrect sort code and account number that it was sent to, against my own. So hopefully they can sort something out in less than the 6 days they say it usually takes, on a plus note though they told me I was eligible for a credit card that they can get to me in about 3 days so at least I can take bits off there until something comes through. I'm just annoyed at having a day off tomorrow and having no damn beer again coupled with having not been out for over 2 months now with all this arsing about waiting for this that and the other. I'm not all that bothered about the beer shortage but I've no fags either, and that is annoying as I can't work on dev stuff without them as I can't treat myself when I finish something. "jaffa cakes take" sums it up quite nicely I think. Anyway at least Stargate Atlantis is back on.. In Canada. Which is cool as it doesn't stop me

Tim B

Tim B

 

Headlines

Hehe, nice headline! http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/west_yo...ire/6138726.stm The name of the headline I mean not what's in the report itself.

Tim B

Tim B

 

God's Computer

This is god making mankind at his computer.. Enjoy! http://www.pi.pwp.blueyonder.co.uk/creation.html

Tim B

Tim B

 

Etc etc Yada yada

Well once again its Saturday and I still haven't put the lottery on yet! :lol: I'll go down and do it in a minute as I've gotta go to the cash point anyway for tonight, and I've run out of fags. Lol On to other things I recently read that the former headmaster of the primary school I went to as a child has died of cancer recently. He'll be missed, he was a good guy and I remember him well. Click here for the full story Not doing a lot at the moment, plan to meet a few people at the pub then go round town starting with that new place. After a large intake of take away pizza that is ^^ I was hoping to watch at least one Stargate episode before I leave but I don't think either of them will be down in time so that's probably gonna be tomorrow now. Not much else to report really.. Oh, and have a look at these: http://stormscenes.com/ http://drawapig.desktopcreatures.com/ http://www.channelchooser.com/ http://uncyclopedia.org/wiki/Main_Page

Tim B

Tim B

 

New Start

Ok thought I'd give this place a bit of a tidy, I've saved all the old entries to my computer and nuked the old blog here. I thought I'd start it from scratch again :lol: Since I've suddenly got a lot more free time than I have had over the last 12 months, what with being fired this week after a year of service for no reason whatsoever and with no explanation (hello lawsuit!) I bet its something to do with that new idiot assistant manager who came in recently as well, he's a knob who likes stirring up trouble and starting fights with everyone. He wants his head kicking in really, he's never been a manager of anything before either so I bet he's getting off on it. Anyway never mind, can have some fun with the benefit office now and get free beer money :lol: Which is another thing actually, spent more time down the pub these last few days than I have in the previous few weeks, so will have to keep an eye on that. Lonely as hell in this house by myself though so can't help it really come evening, off work or not. Oh yeah that reminds me, there's a new series of The Real Hustle starts tonight on BBC3 I believe (07/09/06 ffr) and that's a good show. Its a documentary type thing where common scams are exposed by anti-fraud experts on members of the public. (Who get their money back and agree for the footage to be shown obviously) Its really clever how some of it is done. See the website here: http://www.bbc.co.uk/bbcthree/tv/real_hustle.shtml On another plus side our game UT2004 server is doing as well as ever and we have a nice little gaming community going there at the moment, something helped out a lot by our own special RPG Invasion mod that no one else has for their own servers. We have a little website for it here: http://204.11.33.157/invasion/ Not much happens there though, the servers where all the action is! Here's a couple of screenshots from the server that I've managed to grab through the madness! Bin laden about to get flattened ^^ If you have UT2004 then check it out sometime, its called Monster Madness RPG Invasion. Oh and on one final note, Stargate is back this Friday after being absent last week for some reason or another? So there's something good for me on Saturday at least! I'd love to waffle on all night but I'm getting hungry and Dr Who is on BBC 3 in about 10 minutes, so I'll catch yous later. Take care! -- Tim

Tim B

Tim B

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