Well what a few days it has been since Friday.
Decide that as I have not been out for a drink in months, I would go to the pub. Have a few pints and on the way home I am walking up the road to the future in-laws house and find a nice 3inch deep pothole to put half my foot into it then takes me 5 minutes to walk the further 100 yards to the house, in pain, to be greeted with “where the hell have you been, I want to go home”. After being told not to be so stupid it doesn’t hurt, about a dozen times on the 10 minute drive home, I hobble in the house, take my shoe of and the o/h realises how swollen my foot actually is. So at Midnight, it is of to the local A&E dept. After waiting for 20 minutes and finally being asked what the problem is after 20 non essential questions by the receptionist, I get to see a nurse who seems would be quite happy not to be there. After the usual questions she informs me that I need to come back in the morning as x-ray is not open at night, but as I am in pain I let the fact that it is a 30 mile round trip from home go, and return home with a couple of “pain Killers” that would have worked well if it was a paper cut I went there for but unfortunately not so good if it is an injured foot.
Well off we trot (in my case limp) to the A&E dept for round 2. We get there, and tell the receptionist that we have come to have my foot x-rayed and explain the earlier visit and tell her that the happy nurse was going to create an x-ray form to save a bit of time, this is when we found out happy had not created a form, therefore we had to go through the whole process from the start. By this time I was in severe pain from walking on the ball of my foot as I could not put any weight on my poorly foot, at all, could not even move it. Had the x-ray and had to limp back to the waiting area to see a doctor. He came and called me so I limped to the cubicle to be tended to and all he said was “I cant see any break in your foot so keep on it and it will be fine in a couple of weeks”. KEEP ON IT, did he not realise how much it bloody hurt. 14 hours in severe pain, walking like I’ve had a toilet accident and with one foot twice the size of the other and he tells me to keep on it. Well we go home and taking no notice of the kind doctor who spent all of 30 seconds with me, I put my foot in an elevated position on the sofa.
Having rested my foot after the half mile tip toe around the hospital (partly due to my considerate o/h parking 300 yards downhill of the entrance) I start to feel peckish, so the o/h reluctantly agrees to cook dinner of scampi and chips, then to top the day off, as I’m eating dinner, I hear a crack come from my mouth and on inspection with my tongue, I realise I have broken one of the teeth that is being taken out soon.
Well it is now getting to the end of the weekend and my o/h phones me to tell me that as she is not happy with the diagnosis by Flash the doctor,and there is no improvement in my condition, she has called a colleague in the Dudley ED and has booked me in to see them!!!! So she comes home from work and takes me back to hospital (thankfully we bypass the queue and get pretty much straight into x-ray. After a much more thorough investigation the SHO tells us that I may have a fracture that they cannot see so I should rest my foot and use crutches that they gave me and come back in a weeks’ time. Now I have not used crutches for years, and anyone who has used them will know that they are not exactly user friendly. They give me a crash course (quite literally) and send me on my way……straight through the packed waiting room, and as some of the staff there know me and my o/h as we are saying goodbye it suddenly dawns on me how much of a complete numpty I looked on these crutches stumbling through the waiting area with nothing to watch apart from some blithering idiot getting nowhere fast on a set of crutches, oh, the humiliation.
That is the end of this essay on what I did over the weekend